not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
