your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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