I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
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