Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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