just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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