it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
