Plan B is the new Plan A
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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