craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize