first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
