She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
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The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
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Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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