worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
that may or may not have been my penis.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize