You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
