I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
