It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
