Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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