S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
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we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
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I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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