dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize