sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
