CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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