doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
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