No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
