I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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