you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think your dad took our porno
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
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