I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
