you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
