Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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