I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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