just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
