They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
