Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
