took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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