yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize