We won't sleep together?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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