Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize