I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize