God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize