Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
