Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
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