would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
