This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
