as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
