I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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