Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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