we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
My bed smells like the plague
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
