Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
No subtext here. People are naked.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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