Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
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I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
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Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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