They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
