the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize