found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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