no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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