I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Only a mothe r could love this liver
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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